One of the best things that you can do as a parent, is link up and have discussions with other parents. It's a good way to let off some steam, pose questions, and even contribute advice from your own experience. For those who have that support system, You understand how valuable it is. However for those who don't have that support yet, it can be a little intimidating. You see, Parenting is kind of an exclusive group in it's own way. For instance, if you walk into a group of parents that already know each other, they are probably going to be discussing something that needs no introduction or or back story; as if the the phrase "... smeared all over their back and all over the car seat" is a universal lingo for all parents. So for people who aren't parents, or for new parents, they can seem kind of like an outsider. And if you are a Dad, you are kinda-even MORE of an outsider. 

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Throughout my kids pre-school and elementary years, I was always going places with them. Whether it was the park, or the grocery store, or the mall, or school functions, we were always attached by the hip and people recognized that. However, befriending other parents - who are essentially strangers - was not as easy as you would think it would be. First off, the majority of the time, I was the lone dad in the group. So #1 talking to strangers can be difficult, and #2 talking to strangers who are women adds another layer of social awkwardness. #3 Talking to women about their children can add to that awkwardness. #4 Especially if you are a Dad talking about daughters. I mean, everybody knows with girls, when you change their diaper you wipe front-to-back, front-to-back. With boys, you just dip them in a barrel of soap water and hose them down. 

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But though it was very easy for me to have those conversations, I still noticed an invisible barrier. And listen, I totally get it. It's just the way things have been for thousands of years, so I wont't be all hurt over it, but you know what... I was kinda a little bit hurt. Because I feel that the best thing adults can do for the youth is give them the opportunity to meet their greatest potential. And I feel that COLLECTIVELY, this can be done at a greater level, than just individually. So I was really hoping to get into a lot of those Parent circles a have some of those gem discussions...but hey, maybe I just scared people off with my enthusiasm (it is a real thing.) 

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Now, let me just say that when both parents are present, it makes the process of talking to other parents SOOOOOO much easier. It's almost like the validation of "okay, you are real parents, we will discuss our children's lives with you." But if you're a single dad, it's almost like your not fully accredited and are not allowed to just jump on in the conversation. Dad's do not get that free pass. So, Dad's let me start with this: 

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Your true intentions will reveal themselves. 

For me, I knew I shouldn't worry about the stigmas in society, I should just do what I do, and parent how I'm going to parent for the well-being of my kids. Sometimes my answers may not be appropriate and sometimes they may be mind-blowingly informative. But in either case, I was always proud of my work as a parent.  So don't be discouraged if you don't "fit in" with all the parents, just keep focused on the important agenda, which is the kids.

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And when you do try to spark up conversations with random parents, a good tip is to start with the easy stuff such as "How old are your kids? Mine are 5 and 7. How do they find the school curriculum? Mine adhere to a special diet because of allergies, how about yours?" These are things that almost every parent can feel comfortable discussing. 

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